


I.T.

by G33kinthepink



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Did I Mention Fluff, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Light Angst, M/M, Overdosing, Phone Calls & Telephones, Pining, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-05-19 23:17:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19365718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/G33kinthepink/pseuds/G33kinthepink
Summary: Steve was never handy with technology, but he was stubbornly determined. However, when Tony gives him the number of his favorite I.T. guy, he suddenly finds himself with a whole new problem. Through their numerous phone conversations, he falls and falls hard, despite never even meeting the guy. Though that wasn't for lack of trying, seems his new crush had some pretty strange rules about dating. He just needed to find out why. Fortunately, as has been mentioned, Steve was stubbornly determined.This story was originally written as a bunch of phone conversations, so I've had to jazz it up to make it more "story form". AU so Loki isn't a God, Though whether or not Steve is a super hero isn't really mentioned. Lots of fluff and cuteness, you've been warned. Also, no smut, but masturbation is mentioned.





	1. Chapter 1

 

  "Oh come on, you've got to help me," Steve whined holding the foreign flat,square object in his hand.

  “Nope, no way,” Tony argued feigning business at tightening something in his new computer desk.

  "Seriously?” Steve frowned in disbelief. “You can build this ridiculous, multi monitor monstrosity, but you can't help me set up a laptop?"

  "Nobody on this planet has the patience for that," Tony said waving his screwdriver at the other man. "And monstrosity? This is a thing of beauty. A piece of Art."  
  
  "If you say so."  
  
  "Like I expect you to see it." Stark returned flatly, returning to assembling the desk. " Come into the modern age Steve, get on board it or get run over by it."  
  
  "I'm trying,” Steve sighed regarding the still lifeless laptop in his hands. “But nobody will help me.

  "Wait," Tony suddenly paused, eyeing Steve with a narrowed gaze. "You asked Clint first?"  
  
  "I knew you'd say no."Rogers replied with a shrug.  
  
  "Ouch that hurts,” Tony said covering his heart as though he'd been stabbed. "Oh, you know what, I do know a guy who can help you. He's probably the only man, no the only person on this entire planet who can," he stated gesturing grandly. "But just for that, I won't give you his number."  
  
  "Oh come on Tony, you've gotta throw me a bone here, I'm trying," Steve begged petulantly. Seeing the man wasn't budging he lowered himself to actual begging "Please Tony what do you want? I'll do anything just to get this to not be a $500 paper weight."  
  
  "Anything?"  
  
 Steve narrowed his gaze, he'd just walked right into this one.  
  
  "Mario Kart Mondays," Tony continued with a smirk.  
  
  "No, what?" Steve gaped taken aback by the proposal. " I'm more hopeless at that than I am at figuring out this Len-Nah-voh."  
  
  "It's Lenovo genius," Stark informed. "And you did say anything. C'mon, we need a forth and you know pep won't play. But hey, if you don't want help."  
  
  "Fine," Steve sighed in defeat, shaking his head and hoping he wouldn't live to regret this.

  Tony far too cheerily pranced out from behind the giant desk he was assembling and tore a piece of the instructions off. Quickly jotting down a number. “Don't say I never gave you anything.”

  Steve regarded the number with some scrutiny. “Loki, is he any good?”

  “Any good? Who do you think I'm going to call to hook up all these monitors once my masterpiece is finished?”

  “I still don't see why you need 8 computer monitors.” Steve said skeptically.

  “Porn, obviously,” Tony said with a nonchalant shrug.

  “Haha very funny, Steve said flatly. Then furrowed his brow in thought. “Wait, you have somebody else work on your computers? I don't get it”

  “Why spend my evenings on working on this when I can pay somebody and enjoy more time with Pep.” He said brightly as he returned to work.

  “That's very magnanimous of you.” Steve said still waiting for the catch.

  “Yes, well, Pep threatened to cut me off for a month if I kept her waiting for dinner one more time.”

  “Good thing you'll have your monitors then.” Steve quipped

  “Oh hey, was that a joke? I almost missed it. Good one buddy.” Stark said causing Steve to just shake his head at him as he left. “Don't forget, Monday at 8”

 

************

   "Okay Click on that," Loki directed from the other end of the phone line. Steve hated having to ask a stranger for help, but he was desperate. And so far this Loki guy seemed nice enough.

  "Just click it , how?" Steve asked looking at the laptop in trepidation. Everything on it begged to be clicked. Just what was he clicking?  
  
  "Oh, uh sorry, right click," Loki explained evenly as if that answered anything.  
  
  "Again, how?" Steve could already feel his frustration rising. This was a terrible idea. Maybe he'd just never get the hang of modern technology. Would that really be so bad?

  "Oh, let's see there should be a small square box in the bottom middle of your laptop," Loki explained, his voice even and light. Not sounding judgmental or laughing at Steve's lack of computer knowledge. Not yet anyway. "Just below your keyboard with a small line dividing the lower quarter of it. Just press on the right side of that line and it should register your curser."

  "Got it ,"Steve said feeling just a tad bit better. Baby steps, he had this.

  "Good, now left click there." Loki directed smoothly, the accent of his voice turning his words out like butter.  
  
  Steve doesn't know why it matters, but he's not about to question it as he reaches over with left hand to click. Maybe this was some form of limbering exercise  or something."Okay."

  "What did you just do?" Loki asks suddenly curious, throwing Steve off at his question.

  "I left clicked,like you said," Steve explained feeling the panic rise again.  
  
  "Nooo, you right clicked," Loki stated. He could see Steve's screen somehow through the magic of technology. Something called networking and screen mirroring. Steve understood none of it other than the IT guy could see exactly what Rogers was seeing on his own computer.  
  
  "No I didn’t," Steve argued, because screen mirroring apparently couldn't distinguish the left hand from the right. "I guarantee it. I used my left hand."  
  
  "Ahhhh gotcha, okay," Loki said pausing just a moment. "Let’s take it back a step, shall we?"  
  
  To Steve's utter amazement, the man then patiently explains the difference between right and left click like it’s no big deal. However once it's explained, it certainly makes more sense. Still, Loki walked him through it all in terms he could understand, and somehow didn't judge Rogers for being an idiot at all through the entirety of it. The guy was truly amazing.  
  
  "I feel like a total idiot," Steve admitted with a frown as he rested his hand on the touch pad, mentally practicing right click, left click, right click, left click

  "Well, you’re not." Loki gently assured him and something in his tone was so honest. "I’ve had worse."  
  
  "You have?" Steve asked smiling at how bolstered he felt at the other man's reassurances. He didn't even know him, but the way he spoke, eloquent without coming off as haughty, informative, yet down to earth so Steve didn't feel like he was being talked down to in the slightest, and patience, this guy had to be the most patient person on the planet. Steve would have to remember to thank Tony for the recommendation.

  "Well, you at least figured out how to plug it in and turn it on." Loki informed and that brought a definite smile to Steve's lips.

  "Oh, wow," he remarked, thankfully he knew how plugs and power buttons worked, so maybe he wasn't completely helpless after all.

  "Hey, don’t worry about it," Loki continued further endearing himself man he'd never met. "We all started somewhere. Nobody is born knowing how to operate a computer."

  "Thanks man," Steve said feeling his shoulders relax at the other man's assurances. "I mean it. I appreciate you being patient with me."  
  
  "That’s what I’m here for." Loki returned in that light, easy manner of his. Steve felt he could chat with this guy all day, just listening to whatever topic in that breezy manner of his. The other man walking him through the rest of the basic set up of his laptop. Before Steve knew it, they'd been chatting for well over an hour. It was just so easy to work with this guy,though to be honest, it was more listening than anything. Steve could have listened to him all day, the smooth lilt, the well articulated words, the breezy attitude that relayed to Steve over and over that it was all okay. He could do this. Loki truly was amazing.   
  
  Then, just when he thought he couldn't get any more endearing, he asked Steve the magic question. "Hey, do you read?"  
  
  "Do I ever! Steve brightened even further at a subject he was well versed in.  
  
  "I have a book to recommend for you that I think will really help you out," Loki suggested than paused a bit uncomfortably. "Just..uh..don’t get offended at the title or anything. "

  Steve wasn't offended, not in the slightest. He trusted Loki's guidance, the man had yet to lead him astray. So that same day he went out and bought Computers for Dummies. It's such a wealth of information, Steve devours it like candy. Reading through it twice, thrilled with all the knew knowledge he's gleaned.  
  
 ********************


	2. Chapter 2

 

  "Hey Loki I wanted to thank you for that book recommendation." Steve says calling him back a few days later. Now that he's had some time to play with his new laptop and grown more familiar with it." It really helped a lot."  
  
  "You read the whole thing already?" Loki asks, his voice honestly surprised.  
  
  "I did, yeah," Steve admits rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. He's been nervous about this, but hearing Loki's voice is already helping to calm him again. The lilt and flow of it almost grounding. " I think I’m ready to take the next step and set up my internet."  
  
  "Oooh, I don’t know," Loki said and Steve could already tell by his tone that he was joking a bit. "That’s a really big commitment man. You sure you’re ready?"  
  
  "Yeah, I also picked up the Internet for Dummies book while I was at the book store, so I may have a bit of a head start." Steve returned wryly. He was used to people joking with him, it just made him like Loki all that much more now.

  "Perfect," Loki replied jumping right in eagerly, no questioning of Steve's abilities,no teasing him for being behind the times, just taking Steve at his word with full on confidence. Yep he definitely liked Loki a lot more now. "Let’s walk you through getting all set up."  
  
 ***Much later***  
  
  "Have you decided yet?" Loki asked patiently. Stars only knew how he could still sound so easy going while Steve literally was sweating over making this decision, and had been for quite some time now.

  "I don’t know, this is a pretty big deal." Steve sighed staring at his screen still in deep thought.

  "Look, if you don’t like it, you can always try the other one." The other man assured him as if it were that easy.  
  
  "But by then I’ll have to start all over. " Steve lamented pointing out why it wasn't so easy. "Why can’t I just use Internet Explorer?"  
  
  "Steven," Loki chided gently. "Do you want to be the laughing stock of your friends? Be progressive, now it’s easy. Just flip a coin, heads Google Chrome, Tails Firefox."

  "That’s leaving far too much to chance." Steve returned stubbornly. "Which one do you use?"

  "Are you kidding me?" Loki laughed, and Rogers thought it sounded positively musical." I sold my soul to Google a long time ago, it’s Chrome for me."

  "Well, then that’s what I’ll use." Steve stated with an affirmative nod, feeling better about having some direction.

  "Aww that’s so sweet," the other man jested light and teasing again. "Now we’re twinsies."

  "Laugh all you want," Rogers returned, now fully expecting the innocent teasing from the other man." I’ll be calling you at 3am the first time I have an issue with this."

  "I’ll be here," Loki replied instantly.

  "Wow really? " Steve said not believing his ears.

  "Well yeah, why not? "Loki returned as if it should've been common knowledge that he'd be available all hours of the night to help Rogers out.

  "Thanks man," Steve said feeling the need to relay the immense gratitude he felt you're the other man." I really appreciate this. You’ve been so, so very patient with me."

  "That’s my super power - just call me patient man," Loki quipped bringing a broad smile to Roger's lips.

  "Yeah well really, you’ve been great. Much better than my so called friends have been."

  "Well, their loss man,"Loki said then continued to blow him away with his sincere words."Seriously, I just spent the last hour...no,make that hour and a half talking to probably the last honestly nice guy on the planet."

  "And That would be my super power." Steve returned smiling so much his cheeks now began to ache. Honestly, he'd never met this man, but already felt like he'd waste no time jumping to his aide should he ever need anything in return.

  "Hey, I’d believe it," Loki stated again even and honest,

  "So, is there a manager or anything I can call to give you a good review, maybe get you a raise?" Steve asked a bit hopefully. He really wanted some way to repay Loki for all the help he'd been.

  "Whoa, careful there," Loki warned suddenly "With great power comes great responsibility."

  "Too nice?" Steve asked already knowing the answer.

  "Way too nice," he returned with a small huff of a laugh. "Look, I appreciate the offer, but I’m good with just keeping my head down and NOT getting noticed. You get on their good side and they’ll soon give you extra work."

  "Dually noted," Rogers said nodding into the phone as of the other man could see him. If only.

  "Well what are you doing still talking to me?" Loki suddenly asked, snapping Rogers out of his musings. "You’ve a whole internet to explore. Be gone with you."

  "Alright, alright.Seriously, thanks again," Steve said already lamenting the end of their conversation. For some reason he just felt like he wanted to listen to this other man talk all night. "You've been amazing."

  "I’m hanging up now," Loki teased flatly. "Gotta go check my damn blood sugar after that."

   Steve laughed and finally hung up feeling bolstered and really honestly happy. That guy really had a way with helping people. With helping Steve and he really was beginning to enjoy talking with him. He wondered absently what he looked like, how tall was he, what color was his hair, his eyes? What did his apartment look like. Whoa there Rogers! Getting a bit ahead of yourself there. However, perhaps it wouldn't be so bad to get to know this IT guy a bit more, right?

*********   
  


  "So I bought this new software called Avast Anti virus," Steve stated turning the aforementioned Software's packaging over in his hand to look at the back. He could hear Loki crack open a soda in the back ground and the squeak of his chair as he settled into it. "You know anything about it?"

  "Whoa hitting the porn sites already?" Loki asked his voice sounding honestly surprised.

  "Definitely not intentionally," Steve said feeling the color rising to his cheeks. "Let’s just say that Hysterical Literature is not what you’d think it is."

  "Oh bless your innocent eyes," Loki chuckled. Steve never minded when Loki teased him, he knew there was no malice behind it. He also knew he'd tease and move on, unlike Tony who liked to just keep digging at him. 

  "Ha ha," Steve replied flatly. "I’m not that innocent. I was in the Army you know?"

  "I stand corrected," Loki said with that little huff of a laugh he sometimes did. "And actually I didn’t know that about you, but now I do. Right, let me walk you through this."  
  
  Half an hour later and Steve is Laughing so hard he’s tearing up " Stop, stop,, I’m serious, make it stop talking like this."  
  
  "Arrrrrrrr ya sure matey?" Loki jested in his best pirate voice.  
  
  "Yes, yes," Steve said wiping his eyes and trying to catch his breath. "Just normal English is fine."  
  
  "Alright, see the little cog to the right," Loki directed taking a sip of whatever he had been drinking. "That’s your settings button."  
  
  "That always seems to be the settings button," Steve remarked thoughtfully.  
  
  "Hey, you're noticing a pattern here," Loki said, his voice congratulating Steve for being so observant. "See this isn't so haaarrrrrrrd."  
  
  "Funny," Steve said flatly though he was smiling at the Jab  
  
  "Alright alright, left click on that, good, now choose languages," Loki continued walking him through it patiently, just like he always did. "I think you know where to go from here...though if it’s off the poop deck please, leave me out here."

  "Stop, stop I can’t laugh anymore." Rogers pleaded, already smiling again at the other man's antics. Wow, when was the last time he's honestly laughed this hard. He really couldn't remember. "My sides are killing me."

  "Alright, you’re all set there anyway," Loki assured him smoothly." You are now free to browse all the porn you want without fear of contagion."

  "Thank goodness," Rogers replied before registering what the other man had said.".I mean...that’s not."

  "Hey, what you do is all you man." Loki stated quickly. "Just never send me your laptop to work on."  
  
  "Gross," Steve cringed at the mental image.

  "You would not believe," Loki returned sounding just as grossed out. "So you’re good then?"

  "Yeah thanks again man, you’re awesome."

  "Anytime Steven."

  Anytime Steven, Rogers repeated over and over in his head long after he hung up. Did Loki really mean that? Was he really open to chatting with Steve anytime. Steve sure hoped so. He was really beginning to look forward to the sound of the other man's voice. The way he called him Steven instead of just Steve. So formal and yet somehow more personal, more friendly. At least that's how Steve read it. It really was silly, this sudden infatuation for a man he'd never met. And all because he was what… Kind, patient, clever, funny, because he sounded so smooth over the phone and reminded Steve that he wasn't as hopelessly lost as he sometimes felt? Yeah, that was more than enough reasons to find something to call him about. Anytime.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, busy week. Enjoy .

  It took Steve another week before he had anything computer related to call it about. By then he was so eager to hear the other man's voice, that he was already grinning as the line was ringing.

  "Hey Loki," He greeted eagerly. " I got this software A-dobe Illustrator, can you help me with this?" 

  "Whoa,Steven," Loki exclaimed in honest surprise, making Steve think for the briefest of moments that he'd officially gone too far. " I didn’t know you drew?  
  
  "Yeah, I just dabble though." Steve admitted a bit sheepishly  while internally sighing in relief. " I’m mainly an old school pencil and paper guy, but thought maybe I could scan a few in, make them easier to share."

  "Wow, that’s actually very cool," Loki praised him and Steve felt quite humbled by it. "Oh and just in case you have to speak to somebody else later, it’s pronounced Ah-Dobey."

  "Oh, thanks man, that would’ve been embarrassing," He admitted looking at the word and mentally saying it correctly  
  
  "No doubt, so what scanner did you pick up?"  
  
  "Scanner?" Steve asked suddenly confused.  
  
  "Yes, to scan your art work into the computer with," Loki dutifully explained as if it should've been obvious."….you didn’t get a scanner did you?"  
  
  "No," Steve sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. He would surely see through him now. "  I feel like an idiot."  
  
  "Nah it’s cool, " Loki said in his light easy manner that always had Steve relaxing and smiling. Loki would never call him an idiot, so go easy on yourself there Rogers. "You want me to stay on the line while you go to the store to pick one out?"

  "Wha...are you serious? "Steve asked in disbelief. He was not looking forward to going to the tech store. He always felt so lost there. However if Loki were to help him... maybe.  
  
  "No man," Loki chuckles easily, of course it was a joke. Steve deflated a bit until he heard the other man continue. “Just call me when you get there."  
  
  "Really?" Steve still can't believe it, hoping he didn't sound too desperately eager.

  "Yeah, why not?" Loki replied as if it was no big deal. The other guy clearly had no idea just how big of a deal this actually was.Or maybe he did. " I speak Geek, so I’ll be able to translate for you."

  "This is so great,” Steve said already grabbing his keys and heading out the door. A smile so wide it hurt his cheeks already splitting his lips. Mentally thanking all th stars and God himself that he'd ever gotten Loki's number. Heck, that Loki even existed. Could there be a more perfect human? “Thank you so, so much. I owe you big time."

  "No you don’t," the other man scoffed "It’s either talk to you or some old lady who’s wondering why the pop out cup holder on her computer tower broke."

  "They have those? " Steve asked wondering where that would even be.

  "No," Loki stated flatly, of course another joke. Steve was going to have to be quicker than that.  "Now which store are you going to?"  
  
  "Oh, um Best Buy...on fifth. " Steve said as he descended the stairs. Wondering curiously why Loki would want to know that. "I’ll call you back when I get there. Give me twenty minutes."  
  
  "Thirty," The other man corrected. Okay, so he was familiar with the area.

  "Most likely," Steve chuckled, wow he was really doing this, going to buy a scanner. He didn't even know what I've looked like, but for some reason he felt everything was going to be okay.

 

  "Alright I’m at the store," Steve announced, calling Loki as he stepped through the automated doors and nodding to the security slash door greeter. Already feeling the tension knot forming in his gut and trying to ignore it. He wasn't alone here, he had Loki. 

  "Perfect," Loki said guiding him with ease. "They'll be back by the printers."  Steve looked up, scanning until he spotted the overhead sign stating where the printer aisle was. "I pulled up their website to see what was available. I think for your pencil sketches the Canon Prixma Pro 100 would work best. They should have two on the shelf but I’m currently checking for any coupons or lower prices they can price match for you."

  "Holy Cow, you doing all that for me?" Steve asked in disbelief as he quickly made his way through the store. He couldn't believe this, it was completely unreal. Loki was already going above and beyond anything he'd imagined and now this too. Looking up prices and inventory.

  "Of course Steven, I got your back man."  
  
  That one sentence caused his heart to literally skip. Not just because it was said, he'd heard it from others before. But because when Loki said it, he believed it. Loki had his back. He was not alone in this in the slightest.

 

  Steve still was astounded. That had to be the single most easy and hassle free trip to Best Buy he’d ever experienced. Usually he felt so lost surrounded by all the latest and greatest technology, but Loki was there with him every step of the way, even talking to the sales associate so that Steve got the absolute best price for his new scanner. He was still grinning in disbelief as he carried it up to his apartment an hour later. Loki made everything so easy, for once Steve felt much more comfortable faced with all this technology. His words echoing in his head, he had his back. He had his back.

  “Taadaa’ Loki announced cheerily as Steve saw his work displayed on the screen before him.

  “Loki, you are truly amazing,” Steve said looking on in wonder at how easy that had been. He did it, he actually did it, with Loki’s help of course. However here he was, scanning in his art and saving it to his computer. If anyone had told him 2 weeks ago that he’d be doing this, he’d think them crazy.

  “Careful, you keep saying that and it’s going to go to my head.” That smooth lilt giving the words a bit of a devilish undertone.

  “I’m serious, Steve repeated in earnest. "I could never have done this without you.”  
  
  “Steven, of course you couldn’t,” Loki stated in such a heartfelt tone that it took Steve a minute to register what he’d said. Always the sarcastic one, but he enjoyed his sense of humor. He enjoyed being kept on his toes and knowing there was no mirth behind the jokes. Loki could switch from his light humor to his easy understanding manner so smoothly that Steve had no doubt that the other man was an honestly good person. A probably handsome, honestly good person by the sound of his voice. Not that that mattered or even meant anything. Get it together Rogers. By chance he happened to glance up at the clock, just noting the time.

  “Oh, Holy Toledo Loki, I’m so sorry to have kept you working so late and on a Friday night no less. You’ve probably got plans I’m keeping you from.”  
  

  “Nope, sadly this is it." The other man replied far too lightly. " Tragically single.”

  “Wow, really? You seem so likable.” Rogers stated in earnest.

  “Aww I love you too Steven,” Loki quipped lightening up the mood. “Maybe next Friday you can take me on another hot date to go buy Ethernet cables”

  “Haha”Steve mocked back, catching the joke. Though couldn’t help but note how his heart gave a small leap at the knowledge that Loki didn’t have other plans, and that he was single.Come on, this was ridiculous, he hadn’t ever even met the guy. Why was he even thinking like this? “I know what those are by the way.”

  “Gods bless those for dummies books.”

  “They worked for me. “Steve admitted with a shrug.

  “Old dogs new tricks,eh? Loki returned easily.

  “You have no idea." Rogers laughed a bit at the irony of it. "But hey, I’ve kept you long enough today." He'd literally been talking to this other man for hours now. Hours. It was amazing how the time flew by whenever they were chatting.

  “Yeah man, go play with your new toy" Loki said pretty much waving him off over the phone. Though Steve was reluctant himself to actually hang up and cut off that alluring voice.  
  
  "Thanks...seriously, thank you," he said again  
  
  "I’m hanging up now," Loki said flatly derailing any further gushing of gratitude.

  "Bye," Steve chuckled as he hung up, Loki definitely wasn’t one for long goodbyes. Still the euphoria of their conversation lasted long into the night and well into the next day. Loki had his back. He had his back by golly. Did he know that he had his thoughts as well? 


	4. Chapter 4

 

  Steve was on a mission now, he had searched the software section of the store for almost an hour before finally settling on something. Already smiling from ear to ear the entire way back home in anticipation. Sure other people did things on their nights off, go to bars, go dancing, even watch a movie, but this was Steve’s thing, and he was looking forward to every minute of it.  
  
  "Steven, what’s up?" Loki greeted all too cheerily. "Wait you didn’t type Google into the Google search bar and break the internet did you? Because I do not have time tonight to be going down to reset it again."

  “Oh haha, quit messing with me," Steve said flatly, though was already grinning at the other man's greeting."Wait, you are messing with me right?"  
  
  "I don’t know Steven, am I?" Loki returned, then was silent just long enough for Steve to begin to worry. "Yeah I’m just pulling your chain, so really, what’s up?"

  Steve just shook his head. He should've known. "Well I got this software called, Printmaster Platinum."

  "Stevennn," the other man chided gently. "Are you just buying software as an excuse to talk to me?"

  "Noooo,"Steve chuckled nervously as that was nearly exactly what he'd done. He'd been so excited about the purchase as well, knowing he'd be able to talk to his favorite IT guy for hours to help install it. Though it looked useful as well. He wasn't just buying software he'd never use. That would just be wasteful.

  "Liar," Loki retorted playfully calling him out. "Do you even scrapbook?"

  "Well, no," Steve admitted rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

  "Planning on printing your own birthday cards?"

  "It can do that?" He asked honestly surprised, and turning the box over to reread the features printed on the back.

  "Steven, you’re hilarious," Loki laughed, and my how that sound was just music to Steve's ears. Yes, the other man was definitely onto him, though didn't sound put off about it in the slightest. That had to be a good sign. "Did you open it?"

  "No not yet." Steve admitted.

  "Good you can take it back. Everything you need is free online anyway," Loki informed easily, then said something that caused Steve's heart to literally flip and he got the biggest grin from. " Besides, if it were my birthday, I’d much rather have one of your hand drawn birthday cards."

  And there was Loki, pulling the rug right out from under him. My goodness if only this man knew how much that simple comment meant to him.   
“You don’t think that’s too cheesy?" He asked still in disbelief over such a compliment.

 "In this day of generic, prelabeled, sentimentality," Loki rattled off firmly/ " we need more cheesy."

  "Thanks man, really," Steve said nodding along because now that it was said, it said perfect sense and he agreed wholeheartedly.Another point for Loki by being on the same wave of thinking as he was. Though that brought an idea to mind.  "I’ll remember that for your birthday...which is?"

  "Haha nice try." Loki said catching on far too quickly. Steve should've known. "You are not as smooth as you think you are,sir. Besides, I only accept Starbucks ecards for my birthdays."

  "Commercialized prelabeled sentimentality," Steve returned wryly. interesting.

  "Touche," the other man admitted and Steve could practically hear him shrug over the phone. "but I'm addicted to their strawberry frappes."

  "Is that .. Coffee,?" Steve asked frowning at the horrible thought of strawberry coffee. Despite thinking alike, Loki must have some strange tastes, though maybe Steve shouldn't knock it until he tried it. At this point he'd probably try anything Loki suggested at least once.

  "Bro, do you even Starbuck?" Loki jibed at him in honest sounding curiosity.

  "No, I’ve actually never been," Steve admitted with ease because Loki had yet to tease him about being out of touch. It wasn't like Tony or Clint who would never let him live it down. It was Loki, who took everything at face value and usually had a solution ready to go. Which is why Steve was already typing away when his response came.

  "Well, shit, you've gotta go right now!" Loki said urgently. "Call me when you get there and I'll walk you through Starbucks lingo for ordering. Think ventii."

  "No need," Steve informed him, feeling heartened that the other guy would even offer to walk him through the perils of ordering modern coffee. "I have them pulled up on Google."

  "Awww look at you being the computer wiz," the other man said proudly.

  "I was taught by the best." Steve returned honestly. So pleased with how smoothly they fell into easy conversation. Though was that flirting? Maybe it was just wishing it was flirting, still his cheeks were already aching at the constant grin he wore when on the phone with the other man. "So they’re basically like milkshakes?"

  "Nooooo," the other man started to argue. "okay they are a bit, but they’re better and tea infused so not coffee at all. I don't think. Shit maybe I should Google them myself."

  "I’ll take your word for it." Rogers shrugged, he may try one of these one day. Just not today. "Look, I really do want to install this software though."

  "Whatever for?" Loki asked curiously, and my how nice it was that he was willing to chat despite thinking the software thing was a complete ruse. That definitely, had to count for something.   
  
  "Well…. " Steve sighed as he began. Usually hating to admit his shortcomings, but this was Loki. He had his back. "My friend Clint keeps sending me mems and I want to make some to get back at him. Show him I’m hip."

  "Hip?" Loki returned flippantly. " Wow daddy-o that’s rad."

  "What?" Steve asked, knowing Loki was ribbing him, but even he'd not heard rad before, already typing it into Google as he listened.

  "Okay, okay, first of all they’re _memes_ ," Loki corrected gently. "and second, let’s kick his fucking ass at meme war!"

  "Language!" Steve chided automatically before he could stop himself, already cringing as soon as the word left his mouth. Did he really just do that?

  "Yes dear," Loki replied almost as if on cue, bringing a smile to Steve's lips as he moved on as though not even registering it. "Look, don’t open the software, I’m going to show you how to make this straight on your phone so you can just send away."

***much later***

  "Good, you see it in Phonto?" Loki asked, patient as ever in his directions.

  "Yep." Steve assured him looking at the photo.

  "And you got your font, the size you want it all picked out?"

  "Uh Huh."

  "Great," Loki returned eagerly. "I’m going to let you do this one on you own. what do you want it to say?"

  "I don’t know something funny?" Steve replied, he was no good at this. Wit and humor were Loki's department and the other man did them quite well, if Steve did think so himself

  "Well the easiest thing to do is to Google other memes and just steal their message, Like Bro, do you even lift, or I ain’t got time fo dat." He explained mimicking the accents the words would best match to. Something that sounded so funny breaking his usual eloquent lilt to sound so abrasive.

  "Okay,okay, but does the grammar have to be so bad?" Steve asked still not comfortable with their his entire grammar school education or the window for a joke.

  "Oh absolutely!" Loki stated firmly. "That’s what makes it so funny. Oh wait, you said it’s a photo of Clint? How about “When you’re the reason for the company’s safety video?” There, you can use proper grammar for that. Happy?"

  "That’s great! I like it! " Steve said laughing out loud as he typed it in." It’s so perfect!"

  "Thanks I’ll be here all night." The other man said absently.

  Steve knew it was in jest, but it did make him suddenly aware of the time. Glancing up at the clock on the wall just to confirm the late hour. Holy Cow, had they really been chatting that long?  
  "Oh hey, it _is_ late." He apologized, feeling a twinge of guilt at keeping the other man so long. "I’m going to let you go so you can have a life now outside of helping me.”

  “Life, what’s that?" The Loki returned still jokingly. However, Steve was absolutely not prepared for what followed. "But it does remind me, I’m going of town next week, if you need anything here’s my cell phone number." He said sending it over in text

  “Oh..wow," Steve said staring at it a bit stunned. Loki's cell number. His actual private number. Had they reached private number level of friendship already? "Thanks man, I appreciate it, but I wouldn’t want to bother you while you’re on vacation.”  
 

  “It’s no bother Steven," Loki assured him as if it were no big deal, and maybe it wasn't. Maybe Steve was seeing it as more than Loki was. "Just call me if you need anything.”

  "Really?" Steve asked, wanting to be reassured one more time that it really was okay.

  "Yeah, you think I’d go away and leave you to your own devices for a week. Just think of the mess I’d come back to." And there it was, the light hearted quip that was 100% all Loki. So quick that it would've caught anyone else offguard. Anyone but Steve.

  "Oh ye of little faith." Steve said already grinning ear to ear as he continued to stare at the number.

  Goodnight Steven," Loki said flatly, cutting him off from any further questioning or gushy goodbyes as he hung up. Steve still couldn't believe it, Loki's private cell phone number. This definitely, positively meant something, it had to, didn't it?

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

  Shit! Steve was totally lost here. There was no way he was going to figure this out on his own. He'd already been standing here staring at the shelves of wine for a good twenty minutes now. His lips thinned in a line of pure determination, until finally he pulled out his cell phone. Well he did say _anything_.

  "Awww Steven," Loki greeted in his usual half sarcastic tone. "And here I thought you wouldn’t call."

  "What do you know about wine?" Steve opened immediately, though hearing his taunt brought with it such an overwhelming rush of familiarity and comfort he got whenever talking to this man.

  "Oooh big date?" Loki asked sounding far too intrigued.

  "No, definitely not." He said clarifying quickly. Then decided what the hell, it could work in his favor, and added. "I’m as tragically single as you are man."

  "Yes, but at least yours is by Your choice."

  "What? "That was a strange response.

  "Never mind, doesn’t matter, “ Loki said quickly changing the subject. “Anyway to answer your question -yes, I’ve read several books on wine”

  "Big reader?" Steve asked now intrigued himself.

  "Total bookworm. You turned off yet? "The other man quipped back instantly.

  "You kidding?" Rogers returned already grinning ear to ear at yet another endearing fact about his new friend. "That’s a turn on in my book."

  "Ooh, library kink, I’ll remember that," Loki replied far too wickedly.

  "Please don’t," Steve begged already blushing to his ears as he glanced around the aisle to make certain he was still alone.

  "And he doesn’t deny it!" Loki burst out laughing so heartily that Steve just laughed along instead of trying to correct him. He could be into library kink, who knew?

  "Look my friend Tony is throwing this party and told me to bring the wine." He said finally filling Loki in and getting him back on the subject at hand. "He’s kind of particular and I don’t want to embarrass myself, but I have no idea what I’m doing."

  "Steven, breathe, it’s okay. I got your back, remember?" Steve did remember, and my how those words seemed to ground him and loosen the tension in his shoulders already. Loki had his back. He could do this. "So what’s the main course?"

  "Uh, steak," Steve replied after a pause to think about it. "Yeah he definitely said he’s making filet mignon and I know for a fact that that’s steak."

  "If you didn’t, you would after tonight," Loki returned in his usual dry wit. "Perfect Steak and what’s for desert?"

  "I don’t know, Lemon cake."

  "Really?" He could practically envision the other man crinkling up his nose at the idea. Steve had honestly done the same, but it wasn't his place to be picky over cake.

  "Yeah, his girlfriend Pepper likes it," Steve explained with a shrug even though Loki couldn't see it over the phone.

  "That is fuckin’ weird!"

  "Language,” Steve chided before he could catch himself. Holding his breath and pinching the bridge of his nose as soon as he'd realized what he'd said.

  "Yes dear,” Loki replied sarcastically thankfully relieving the embarrassment Steve felt at doing that. Come to think of it, he'd done that the last time as well. That made Roger's heart skip a little at that. Maybe this could be one of those inside jokes everyone else had. Something just between him and Loki.

  “Sorry, habit.” He said still smiling over the idea.

  “Nah, it’s cute,” Loki said causing Steve's brain to short circuit for a minute. Did he just say cute?? Crap focus here Steven! “So for the main course you’re going to want a good Merlot. Now are you in the liquor store or the grocery store?"

  "Uh, grocery." Rogers informed dutifully.

  "Great," Loki returned without missing a beat "Do they have anything by Clos Du Bois or Columbia Crest?"

  "Yeah, got the Coss Do Boys right here." Rogers said grabbing the bottle and reading over the label before adding it to his basket.

  "Close enough," Loki chuckled at his pronunciation. "Now moving onto the cake, Lemon cake usually isn’t that sweet, so you’re going to want a desert wine to help. I’d recommend a nice Late Harvest Riesling, do they have any Finger Lakes brand there?"

  "Let’s see..reisling..reisling..reisling.." Steve repeated as he read over labels. "Ah yes, here’s some, Finger Lakes Late Harvest Reisling."

  "There ya go." The other man replied in triumph that Steve himself was now feeling. Task accomplished with flying colors. Wouldn't Tony be surprised!

  "So what’s the difference?" Steve asked as he added the wine to the other one in his basket, half because he was curious, half because he just wanted to chat a little longer with his new friend.

  "Well the late Harvest grapes are left on the vine longer which makes them sweeter." Loki informed in his usual patient manner he had when sharing information.

  "Really? That’s so cool." Steve replied honestly." You really do know your wines."

  "That’s what happens when you’ve got nothing but time to read on your hands."

  "Think they make a wine for dummies book?"

  "I know for a fact that they make a for dummies book for literally everything." Loki said with a chuckle.

  "You’re a real life saver man," Steve doted again, "I can’t thank you enough. If you were in New York I’d gladly take you to dinner sometime."

  "I am in New York," Loki surprised him with his answer. "But sadly, I shall have to respectfully decline dinner. My warden doesn’t let me out much."

  Steve laughed at the obvious joke made to ease his being turned down for dinner. However, at least now he knew that Loki lived in New York as well. Single and Local, definitely not a wasted call at all. “Well, the offer’s open should you ever get out.”

  “Thanks Steven, enjoy your party.”

   That was odd, Loki usually quipped more at the end of their conversations. Maybe the whole inviting him out to date hit a nerve, or maybe it made him consider it? Steve would just have to talk to him later to find out.

********************

   “Hey Steven,” Loki greeted cheerily and Steve could easily hear music playing in the background. Perhaps Loki was at a party, or maybe had guests over?

  “Oh, am I interrupting?” he asked immediately, feeling his heart sink, but ready to hang up nonetheless.

  “What?”

  “I hear music, I can call back later if-”

  “If what?" Loki scoffed out loud . "Tragically single just like you,remember? I was just listening to some music. What’s up?"

  “Well I just wanted to thank you again," Steve said, his heart lightening at the other man being alone. In truth he just wanted to hear his voice and spend some time chatting with him again. Both he was finding equally addictive, the usual even, light hearted mood, the smooth accent that lilted his tone. Loki could probably read the phone book and Steve would listen eagerly to every word. Did they even still make phone books? A question for about day. "The wine was a huge hit.”

  “You used the grapes ripening longer tidbit didn’t you?” Loki asked knowingly.

  "That I did". Steve admitted proudly. "Even Tony was impressed."

  "That’s awesome man, good for you," Loki said and Steve felt he genuinely meant it. The comment already causing him to grin so wide his cheeks ached. Yep, this was exactly why he called the other man. "You didn't tell them who told you I hope."

  "I did, but they didn't believe me that my IT guy was giving me tips on wine."

  "That's me IT guy, super human wealth of useless knowledge," Loki joked smoothly.

  "Well it was certainly useful to me," Steve stated honestly, feeling he needed to share the kudos a bit.

  "So what’s that you’re listening to?" Steve asked wanting to keep the conversation light and also wanting to keep the conversation going.

  "This is...," the other man paused and Steve could hear the phone fumble a bit and clicking of mouse buttons. "Oh, One Republic’s new album."

  "Sounds good," Steve stated, and what he could hear of it really did. He quickly jotted the band name down in his notebook to look up later. "Catchy song."

  “Eh, the jury’s still out on the whole album," Loki said unconvinced "but I agree, this is like the third time I’ve listened to this song alone."

  "Let me guess, in a row?"

  "It’s almost like you know me," he teased back and Steve could imagine the other man smirking. He sounded like a smirker. Such a wise-guy. He desperately wanted to know more about him.

  "Ha, I wish," Rogers stated boldly, "I only know our phone conversations man. Though if you ever want to send me a pic, you know, put a face to the name?"

  "No can do man," Loki returned immediately. Blocking yet another advance by Steve. "Can’t have you stalking me on social media. My Warden wouldn’t like it."

  "Loki, I would never ,"Steve said a bit taken aback by the thought, he'd never even imagined such a scenario.  "

  You’re right, I forgot who I was talking with for a second." Loki quipped far too bluntly. " You see Social Media is-"

  "I know what social media is,” Steve said recognizing the obvious rib

  "Ah that’s right, Internet for dummies," Loki said and Steve heard him turn the music down. He felt encouraged by that, as though Loki was settling in to the conversation. Perhaps he was just a bit harder to convince to open up. That was fine, Steve had patience and time a plenty.

  “So single, not dating, heavy reader and lover of new music. What else do you do to fill your time?” Steve inquired wanting to know more about his new...friend? Is that what they were now?

  “Masterbate,” Loki replied far too matter of factly causing Steve to choke on air. “Oh sorry, I forgot who I was talking to again."

  "Oh haa haa, I’m not a chaste little angel you know." Steve retorted though was used to taking a good ribbing. And it was worth it to keep Loki talking for awhile.

  “Heck with my boring life,” Loki scoffed. “What does my darling Steven do to fill his time?”

  “Nothing too exciting really,” Steve replied with a shrug even though Loki couldn’t see it. And darn if that term of endearment even used jokingly, didn't bring back that huge grin to his face. “I read a lot, hang out with my friends, browse the internet..” He added pointedly

  “Call your I.T. guy to chat,” Loki also filled in causing Steve to blush a bit at being called out on his actions.

  “Well, I don’t think of you as just my I.T. guy,” Steve said honestly and my had it suddenly gotten a bit hard to breathe in here.

  “Awww that’s so sweet, are we BFF’s now? “ Loki joked lightening the mood a bit. Though he definitely didn't correct him. Perhaps he enjoyed their chats as well.

  “Well, we are using the same internet browser,” Steve pointed out causing them both to chuckle heartily at the joke.

  Their conversation turned after that melting into just talking about their life in New York. Favorite seasons, Loki loved fall and winter and absolutely despised summer, stating that there was only so much clothing you could remove before it became illegal. Steve agreed with him on the fall and clothing part, but preferred the spring himself, where everything was budding out and new and green.

  “There’s a little park down on 19th” Steve was saying almost wistfully as he pictured it in full bloom in early spring.

  “Oh, the one with the little gardens,” Loki chimed in recognizing that he knew it. Which meant he could possibly live on west side as well. Heck, Steve could pass him everyday and not know it. “I love that park, man. “

  “Well, maybe one day if your warden ever lets you out, I can meet you there.” Steve suggested gently, deciding to push the issue to see if it was truly off limits or not.

  “You are a persistent one,aren’t you?”Loki asked with only a little chiding this time in his voice.

  “Just another one of my super powers.” Steve said grinning easily as he could finally feel his friend beginning to sway on the matter.

  “Well Mr super human, it’s late and I’ve got meeting with my warden in the morning.”

  “Well you tell him to let you out early for good behavior,” Steve said even though he had no idea who this warden was that Loki kept referring to. A question for another night. Right now he was positively brimming with delight. So he was tuned down, but not because Loki wasn't interested, he never said that. He also didn't deny them being friends now. That was a huge win as far as Steve was concerned, even if this didn't pan out like he wanted, he could hopefully still have a great friendship out of it in the process.


	6. Chapter 6

  
  "Loki You have GOT to help me," Steve announced, getting straight to the point as soon as the other man picked up.   
  
  "Anything for you Darling," Loki purred back easily, pausing only to take a sip of whatever he was drinking, the liquid rattling loudly through the straw. "What’s the emergency of the night?"

  There was that endearment again, causing him to try to tell how to breathe before replying. “Mario Kart”

  Loki coughed, choking a bit on his drink and Steve heard him set the glass down quite solidly. Cringing as he already expected the reply. " Shit sorry, did you say Mario Cart?"  
  
  "I know, but look, We get together at Tony’s and team up, me and Clint against Tony and his friend Banner," He rattled off quickly. " and let’s just say, I’m the weak link."  
  
  "Well, we’ve got to change that, don’t we?" Loki responded filling Steve's heart with joy. He didn't know why he even worried about asking his friend for help on this. Loki had his back, always. " Let’s que it up."  
  
  "Great," Steve sighed in relief as he brought the game up on the console Clint had let him borrow for practicing. Steve no sooner cued in than another player joined the game "Whoa, is that you? MischiefMan?"

  "Really StarSpangledHero?" Loki quipped back flatly.

  "Alright,you got me.” Steve chuckled at being called out.  
  
  "Well,Welcome to the age of online gaming my friend. Don’t worry, I’ll let you be Mario.Did they give you a headset?"

  "Yeah, they did." Rogers said, fumbling to pull the piece out of the box.

  "Well right on man," Loki said brightly. " plug it in and we can stop burning up the cellphone minutes."

  Steve eagerly did as instructed, sure enough Loki was there coming in loud and clear. He then spent the next several hours chatting with his friend and getting tips on how to better navigate this mind numbing game. He couldn’t believe how much fun he was having while doing it, though it certainly had everything to do with who he was talking with.

  “A banana peel? Really?!" Steve spat in mock dismay. " I thought I could trust you."

  "You can, " Loki replied smoothly. "You can always trust me to throw the banana peel at the end and to serve you the draw 4 card in a game of Uno"

  "Ooohhh I’ll remember never to invite you to card night then," Steve teased leaning to the right as he fought to get his cart back on track. Tossing his hands up as he lost yet again. “Well, I’m still losing.”

  “Yes, but not as spectacularly bad." Loki encouraged. " Hey, I hate to cut it short, but I have a thing.”

  “Yeah, no worries man,” Steve said wondering what kind of thing would take place on a Tuesday night. Then wondering why it made his mood sink a bit. “I’ll catch you later. Oh and thanks!”

  "You’re thanking me for kicking your ass at Mario Cart?”

  “Language,” Steve joked wanting to keep the conversation light and knowing it would get a rise out of the other man.

  “Yes dear,” Loki replied before hanging up. That at least brought a smile to Steve’s lips. Maybe his thing wasn’t so much a date thing,but rather a business thing.

 

******

  Steve couldn’t get back to sleep, he’d only toss and turn for hours if he tried. Nothing like a good nightmare to wake up your brain. Fortunately he had just the right late night distraction to hopefully help him forget, while simultaneously improving his skills. Needless to say he was quite surprised to get the alert that somebody else was up as well.

  "Hey, Loki,"He greeted putting on his headset.

  "Oh, hey Steven,” Loki returned a bit wearily. "What are you doing up?

  "Couldn’t sleep, you?"

  "Raging insomniac," he heard the other man’s sigh quite clearly.

  "That sucks," Steve replied, honestly feeling sorry for the man.

  "Not if your job is IT. You wanna be Bowser this time?" Loki asked smoothly changing the subject. Steve had grown quite accustomed to that now.

  "Sure," he replied easily rolling with it. Though it only reminded him of another subject that he was far more curious about. "How’d your thing go the other night?"

  "Rough," The other man grumbled. "But it is what it is."

  "Well maybe I can help if you let me know what it is?" Steve offered, eager to give back to this man who had helped him so much already. " Is it woman troubles?" he asked, though secretly hoped Loki would say it wasn't.

  "No,” Loki scoffed with a chuckle

“Good," Steve said already smiling at the small victory. " because I'm terrible with those. So guy troubles then?" 

  "You're the only man in my life right now besides my Warden."

  "Should I be jealous?" Steve asked think he was on a roll. No boyfriend, no girlfriend, this was definitely getting his hopes up.

  "Hardly," Loki scoffed. " oh watch out Yoshi is coming up on your left."

  Steve has his character toss a turtle shell  as Loki had shown how to do him earlier. “Not anymore.

  "Ooohhh good one." his friend cheered, further bolstering him.

  "So," Steve began feeling emboldened. " If I'm the only man in your life, you think I can actually see you sometime?"

  The line got really quiet and Steve thought maybe they'd been disconnected. "Loki?"

  "Yeah, sorry, look Steven, I like you” Loki began and Steve braced himself for the the inevitable I'm not gay, “But I can’t, see anyone right now” Loki said gently and there it was again. It had seemed off the first time Loki had casually mentione’d not being allowed to, but there it was. ”I’m not allowed.”

  “Not allowed?" Steve repeated. " I don't understand… Shit man, how old are you?”

  "Relax," Loki chuckled openly relieving some of Steve's anxiety. "I'm well on my way to 30 and no I don't live in my mother's basement."

  “You ever going to explain what this no dating rule is all about?” Steve asked honestly curious.

  “One day, but not today.”

  
  “Fair enough, I can wait.” Steve said easily.

  “Please don’t,” Loki said suddenly so serious that it caused him to hold his breath. “Don’t ever wait for me. You should live your life and be happy. For all you know I could be some 400lb guy, wasting away to red bulls and hoarding too many Chinese take out containers.”

  “Not that it would matter how much you weigh,I highly doubt that,” Steve replied with a scowl. Somehow he couldn’t think that of Loki. “For one thing there’s no way you’re making enough working I.T. to be able to afford that much Chinese food here.”

  “Well, you are certainly right there,” Loki laughed openly at Steve calling him out. “So you never told me why are you up at this hour?”

  "Nightmares," Steve revealed with a shrug.

  "Oh fuck, that sucks man," Loki said and the honesty in his voice caused Steve's chest to tighten. To have such care for someone he hardly knew, Steve was truly doomed with this man and despite what Loki said, he'd wait 70 years for him if he had to.

  "Language," Steve warned needing to keep the conversation going.

  "Yes dear, but it still sucks."

  "Yeah it does, thank the war for it." Steve informed. " Not much I can do but try to distract my brain afterwards."

  "By playing Mario Cart," Loki observed wryly. "Good distraction."

  "By playing Mario kart and chatting with a really good friend," Steve filled in, already grinning as he tilted the controller, trying to get his character to turn better on the screen.

  Oh shit, I should let you go chat with him then," Loki teased, marking the end of any further serious conversation. Though Steve was fine with that.

  "Haha very funny," Steve replied still grinning, and hours later when he finally bid his good friend good bye to start his day, he couldn't even recall the dream that had awoken him to begin with. 


	7. Chapter 7

 

  "Have you tried turning it off and back on again?" Loki asked ever patient.

  "Does that really work?" Steve asked a bit skeptically, though trying it anyway. He really didn't have any better ideas on how to unfreeze his computer. Having called Loki in a fit of near panic, certain that after all his progress, he'd still managed to break the device anyway.

  "Sometimes," Loki said, and he could practically hear the other guy shrug over the phone. " though mostly it's just buying me more time to look up the issue while your computer reboots."

  "So, what happens if the computer won't turn off and back on again?"

  "Have you tried unplugging it and plugging it back in?" Loki returned easily, not even missing a beat.

  "Funny guy," Steve said already smiling despite his earlier trepidation. Loki always aleviated his stress just by talking. " I should've known you'd have an answer..... Holy Toledo, that worked!" He says in disbeleif staring at his computer in wonder.

  "Of course it did," The other man replied and now Steve could definitely hear the smirk in his voice.

  "You had no idea that would work." Steve countered as he logged into his device.

  "I had some idea."

  "Oh wait.." Steve held his breath as he read the little message that popped up onto his screen, stalling any further action.

  "Let me guess," Loki said smoothly. " it's installing updates?"

  "Yeah, how'd you know?" Of course he would know, it was his job to know, but Rogers was still surprised at times at how the guy had this eerie sixth sense about computers.

  "Steven, when was the last time you turned it off?" Loki asked, also revealing that he had an eerie sixth sense about Steve's habits as well.

  "Uhhhh.." Good question, Steve can't even recall when the last time was that he had turned the laptop off since he'd gotten familiar with using it. It just never occurred to him that he had to.

  "Never mind, that's all the answer I need," Loki chuckled. "Don't worry darling, as soon as it's finished I'm going to network right in and set it to automatically install the updates from now on while you're asleep."

  "You can do that?" Steve asked completely blown away that that was even an option. Seriously, Loki was on par ingenious level with Stark himself.

  "Yep, now when do you usually sleep?"

  "That's a bit tougher question." Steve admitted scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

  "Your're right, what an I thinking, your usually up all night chatting with me," Loki replied flatly, easily dispelling the situation with wry humor. "Right easier question, when are you usually not on the computer?"

  "Let's see," Steve said pausing to give it some thought. "Oh, I usually go jogging every morning around 5:30."  
  
  "Am or PM?" He clarified and Steve could still hear him typing away on his keyboard, watching the now familiar movements of someone else programming his PC. Networking In Loki had called it. It was practically magic as far as Steve was concerned.  
  
  "AM."  
  
  "Gross, but okay," Loki teased causing Steve to smirk at the obvious jesting. So he decided to elaborate a bit.

  "Then I go to the gym for a couple hours right after," he informed

  "Ugh stop, you're a mad man."  
  
  "So from about 5:30am to 8:30am," Steve stated smugly, knowing it was just to goad the other man.

  "Steven, you just reminded me how ridiculously out of shape I am." Loki said with a small sigh.

  "Sorry?"

  "No you're not," Loki returned easily, Rogers could tell the other guy wasn't really bothered by it.

  "It gives me something to do when I can't sleep and need to clear my head." He explained now shrugging himself.

  "Damn, maybe I should take up jogging." Loki said reminding Rogers that he wasn't the only one affected by sleepless nights. " Nothing else has helped."

  "So I'm curious," He asked, now familiar enough to pry into more personal matters with his friend. "How's insomnia work, you just don't sleep? That seems impossible."

  "No I sleep." Loki informed with patient ease, never berating Steve for his lack of knowledge on a subject no matter what it was. " In fact I usually crash around 11 or so. The problem is my body wakes back up around 2am thinking it slept a full 8 hours. My brain clocks on, starts raining off useless shit and I'm up for the rest of the night. That will go on for weeks, then I'll sleep like fuckin', sorry friggin' rip van Winkle for the a day or so. Then it cycles all over again."

  "Wow." Steve exclaimed trying to wrap how head around living like that and still being in such an easy mood all the time. Loki truly was a gift.

  "I know, good times, right?" He jested with a chuckle.

  "I somehow don't feel as bad about my 3 and 4am wakes ups." Rogers admitted honestly.

  "Glad I could serve as a bad example of how shitty it could be." 

  "I don't know, getting to talk to you at odd hours instead of trying to distract my brain by myself, I'd almost call that a perk." 

  "Almost?"

  "Well, there is the sarcasm and language that I have to overlook." Steve said already smirking, if he didn' know better, he'd say his friend's wry wit was wearing off on him.

  "Language okay, I'll give you that," Loki admitted smoothly. "But my sarcasm, now that's a perk."

  "Hey, before I forget," Steve said finding it the perfect segway into another topic to keep the man talking. "I'm going away next week. Tony is insisting on everyone joining him at his beach house for vacation."

  "Have fun for me," Loki said actually sounding like he meant it.

  "Don't you ever get away to the beach?"

  "Nah, I'm a little short of rich friends with beach houses," Loki said though didn't sound jealous in the slightest.

  "Oh, sorry, hey I didn't mean to brag or anything," Steve said quickly feeling a bit sheepish for how he'd so offhandedly said it.

  "Brag?" Loki scoffed busting out in laughter. "Steven you are positively the most humble man I know. I would never accuse you of bragging."  
  
  "Just another super power I guess," Steve said already smiling again.

  "Look out, here comes Humble man," Loki said in a big theatrical voice. Then lowered it to normal levels. "Yeah, I don't see that take taking off, sorry darling."

  "It's okay," Steve chuckled at the man's antics. "I just wanted to let you know."  
  
  "Yes, good to know I'll be playing Mario Kart solo for awhile."  
  
  "Hey, now, don't get too much better than me." Steve warned playfully.   
  
  "Too Late." Loki teased back flatly.   
  
  His computer now fixed, their conversation dissolved after that. Steve had things he needed to get done today, He knew he should be hanging up, but was so very reluctant to let him go. It's just for one week. It wasn't forever. So why did it feel like it?


	8. Chapter 8

  
  
  Steve is standing on the back deck of the beach house, cool sea breeze ruffling his hair, but he was still thankful for the shade provided by the deck's awning. He could see the waves lapping over the sand a mere 50 yards across the pristine white sand. It was truly picturesque, a page right out of a vacation magazine. Roger's could be partaking in any number of vacation type activities right now, but he can only think about one man. It had already been two days since he last spoke to him, but it felt like forever. The yearning to hear his voice was enough to mach his chest hurt at the thought.   
   This was ridiculous, Steve thought with a sigh as he looked at his cell phone. There was no reason he couldn't call. They were friends now, perhaps more. It was what friends did...right?

   "Steven," Loki greeted picking up after just one ring, and sounding honestly happy to hear fro him. "Don’t tell me you need help setting up the internet at the beach?"

   "No, nothing like that," Steve chuckled, already feeling relieved at finally hearing the one he craved.

    "Then why aren’t you outside enjoying it man?,"   
  
  "Pasty white boy from Brooklyn?" Steve explained a bit offhandedly. 

  "I can totally relate," Loki replied, then quickly added. " on the pasty white part."

  "Yeah, that’s definitely not a Brooklyn Accent. London?" Rogers asked, having already actually given it quite some thought already.

  "You got me." Loki returned and Steve could hear the phone shift as he shrugged.

  "Really, no way!" Rogers stated, pleased to be gleaning more and more about Loki with each conversation. " I always wanted to visit London."  
  
  “Well, I wouldn’t be much of a tour guide," Loki stated far too humbly. " haven’t lived there in ages."

  "You’d never know it, from the accent I mean." Steve said happy for that familiar feel as they settled comfortably into conversation. Yes, this was what he was missing and now had zero regrets about calling the other man while on vacation. It was  _his_ vacation by golly, and he'd spend it however he pleased.  " I’ll bet you’re popular with the ladies."

  "You’re a riot man, You think that’s all it takes?"

  "It certainly helps," Steve stated honestly. "I’m not kidding babe, you could look like a real troll and still turn heads with that accent."  
  He hears Loki snickering and frowns. “What?’

  “Babe?” Loki parrots back to him and he can already feel the heat rising in his cheeks.

  “Oh holy cow, did I just call you that?” Steve asked covering his face in embarrassment.

  “That you did,” Loki replies almost proudly.

  “Sorry, sorry," Steve was mortified, ugh he was such an idiot. He couldn't believe he'd just done that. Thank goodness the other man was taking it lightly.  "It must’ve slipped.”

  “Oh, so you only call me that in the shower?”

  “WHAT?” Steve nearly screeched in alarm at the accusation causing Loki to burst out in laughter on the other end. Oh the cheeky devil, he should've know Loki would turn this into humor for his own amusement. “Alright, you know what, just for that, I’m calling you babe from now on.”

  “Go ahead darling, I like it,” he said biting out the last two words as if implying something dirty.

  “Why do I even call you?” Steve growled though he didn’t mean a word of it. He knew that this back and forth banter was exactly why he often called. He loved Loki’s quick wit and sly sense of humor.

  “Because you love me,darling,” Loki returned easily and Steve wanted to deny it,but just couldn’t. It felt too much like a lie if he did.

  “You wish,” He finally settled on and looked out across the water. “Oh hey, the sun is setting, wanna see?”

  “Sure, send me a photo,” Loki said and Steve wasted no time in snapping off a couple of pics, and sending them off. “Wow, that’s really pretty. You should get out there and enjoy it man.”

  “I am enjoying it,” Steve said smiling as he leaned on the deck rail and breathed in the sea air. He truly was, but only because of who he was talking with at the same time.

  Steve called him every day while he was at the beach house and they talked for hours each time. The only day he cut it short was Tuesday and that was because Loki said he had a “thing”. No big deal, he had a thing last Tuesday as well, and the Tuesday before that. It was his Tuesday night thing and Loki never explained what this thing was, and Steve never really felt the need to ask. Especially when he could call late at night and hear that silky smooth voice greeting him. He could count only about a half dozen times or so that Loki didn’t answer his phone when he called. No big deal, the guy had a job and had a life. Loki would always call him back sometime later upon seeing his missed call. He made sure to split the time with his friends so hopefully they wouldn't notice, but he really didn't care. He was happy, of that he could honestly say.

 However, his friend's definitely noticed, though fortunately waited until after their vacation to grill him.

*****  
  


  "Come on man,” Clint was badgering him upon finally returning back home only to reconvene that next night Tony's place for a movie." You spent the entire vacation on the phone and when you weren’t on the phone, you were ...well, you wouldn’t stop grinning for one thing. So spill it!

  “What’s going on here?” Tony asked coming in with the popcorn to watch the movie with his friends.

  “Steve’s got a girlfriend and he won’t spill the details.” Clint said scowling at the blond.

  “I do not have a girlfriend,” Steve said for probably the dozenth time and he wasn't lying. Nope,not one bit

  “Boyfriend then,” Tony filled in far too smoothly earning him a Steve sized glare.

  “Ah hah!” Clint said snapping his fingers eagerly. “That’s it, isn’t it? A boyfriend! You dog man! So tell us, where did you meet?”

  “We, uh haven’t,” Steve replied, suddenly realizing with growing dread how complicated this was going to be.

  “What do you mean?” Clint asked looking back to Tony for support. “If you’re dating him, then you had to have met somewhere.”

  “We’re not exactly dating” Steve admitted shrinking further into the couch. 

  “I’m confused,” Tony said looking at Steve curiously. “Do you have a boyfriend or not?”

  “I don’t know,” Steve said unsure how exactly to explain it in a way that wouldn’t sound completely ridiculous. “I mean I talk to the guy nearly every night, and we have become really close.”

  “But you’ve never met him?” Clint asked again.

  “Well no.”

  “Why not?” Tony asked waiting for Steve to fill in some of the details. “Oh, I know, you met him online and he lives in Idaho or something.”

  “No, it’s not...he live’s in New York it’s just, He’s kind of got this no dating rule,” Steve replied a bit quietly.

  “A what?” Tony leaned in trying to clarify. “Did you just say a no dating rule? Is he 12?”

  “Nooo,” Steve instantly dismissed. “He’s about my age.”

  “So is he a monk?” Tony pressed on.

  “Oh or like one of those guys who takes a vow of celibacy!” Clint answered snapping his fingers as the idea hit him,

  “Pretty sure that's a monk

  “No he’s not a monk, look, he’s just not allowed to date is all. and I don’t know why, he won’t tell me.” Steve replied growing frustrated with the conversation.

  “No dating at all in general, or just no dating you?” Tony continued undaunted.

  “Really Tony?”Steve scoffed.

  “I’m just saying, if the guy won’t meet you, how do you know he’s even into you?”

  “How do you know you’re even into him?” Clint supplied. “Like what’s he look like?”

  “I….don’t know,”

  “WHAT?” Now it was both Clint and Tony chiming in together.

  “We’ve never exchanged pictures,alright,” Steve said getting tired of this conversation real fast. He trusted Loki, why couldn’t hey just be happy for him.

  “Another strange rule?” Clint asked.

  “I don’t know, I haven’t asked him in awhile,” Steve said. “He said he didn’t want to be stalked online. It’s not that big of a deal.”

  “Not that big of a deal? How can you say that” Clint asked incredulously. “He won’t date you, won’t meet you in public, won’t even send you a photo of what he looks like. It sounds more to me that he doesn’t want you recognizing him in public.”

  “I’ll bet he’s married.” Tony added eagerly as if solving some great mystery.

  “That’s it, he’s really married and just leading you on.”

  “He’s not married,” Steve argued getting to his feet, he’d had absolutely enough of this. “And he’s not leading anybody on. He even told me not to wait for him, to date other people.”

  “So I don’t get it, are you boyfriends or not?” Tony asked curiously, stopping Steve in his tracks.

  “I don’t really know,” Steve sighed, suddenly feeling far too exhausted to be thinking about this. He'd honestly never picked it apart like this,but hearing it all out loud, suddenly began filling him with doubt. “I’d like to think so. Look, we talk almost every night. We’re really close, he just, can’t date right now.”

  “Alright, alright,” Clint said wavering as he saw how sincere his friend was, even if his friend was being an idiot. “At least tell us his name.”

  Well that was an easy one, “Loki.”

  “Whoa whoa whoa, my Loki?” Tony piped up, raising an eyebrow.

  “Your Loki?” Clint parroted. “Oh wait, not I.T. Loki!” Clint stated his eyes going wide at the recognition. “Shut.UP!”

  “You know him?” Steve asked feeling his heart stop a bit, as the feeling of doubt began to swell and grow within him. He knew Tony knew him, but Clint? How? Why?

  “Yeah man, the dude’s awesome,” Clint replied. “Helped me set up my new gaming rig just last week, oh and my new car stereo last month.”  
  
  “And the swank restaurant I took Pep to Friday,” Tony added easily “The guy totally scored me reservations.”

  “Yeah, yeah, and those tickets to the Mets last month, thanks to Loki.” Clint chimed in.

  “The guy literally knows everything about everything,” Tony added cheerily. "I knew he'd hook you up Steve, I just didn't think you'd  _hook up"_ He added giving his friend a playful nudge to the ribs.  
  
  However Steve wasn’t listening anymore, he was positively fuming. Did Clint talk to Loki as often as he did? Did Tony? All the times he couldn't reach him, was it because he was talking to one of these guys? Was one of them his Tuesday night ‘thing’, a standing appointment to reserve his time? Was somebody else? Just how many more people did he talk to on a regular basis? Maybe what he had with him wasn’t so special as he’d thought.


	9. Chapter 9

  In hindsight, Steve should’ve just called Loki when he got home, but he was still too upset over it. It was all his fault too, he should never have gotten so attached. Loki never told him they were a couple, told Steve to not pursue him basically. However Steve, ever the stubborn one, had persisted and now it was his heart on the line. What if he wasn’t treating Steve differently than he treated anyone else? Just how many people did he talk to everyday?

  He didn’t call Loki that night when he awoke from nightmares and was unable to sleep. Choosing to just go hit the 24 hour gym instead, trying to muddle through the thoughts in his head and figure out how best to approach this. He didn’t call the next day either, it was Tuesday, Loki would have his “thing”. Whatever the hell that even meant, but that night after another bout of nightmares robbed him of sleep, he couldn’t hide anymore.

  After a sigh and a moments hesitation, he decided to just get it over with. He booted up the game and sure enough, Loki was there.

  “Hey Steven,” Loki greeted sounding quite tired himself. “I was just about to send the cops to make sure you were still alive.”

  “Yeah, sorry man, I just had a lot going on,” Steve said as he joined into the game and tried to sound like he hadn't just spent the last 48 hours stewing over everything Tony and Clint had brought up. “How’d your ‘ _thing_ ’ go? “

  “Can I not talk about it?” Loki asked sounding honestly worn down.

  But Steve couldn’t hold it in anymore, he needed answers and he needed them now. “You know what? No! I’m tired of you not talking about it. You never tell me anything. Not what this ‘ _thing’_ is you go to every Tuesday, not what this no dating rule is about? Who the hell this warden is that controls you? Not if you even care about me half as much as I-”

  “Steven...STEVEN,” Loki barked cutting off his rant. Steve stopped to catch his breath and heard the other man sigh. “You’re right, I’m keeping you in the dark and it isn’t fair. Just remember, if your illusion of what a great person I am is ruined afterwards, well you asked for it. My _thing_ is AA,”

  “Oh,” Steve said quietly as it hit home.

  “Relax, I'm not a drunk or some junky. I never did heroin, shit I never even smoked pot. It was prescription, I have a condition, shits all wired wrong in my brain and I can’t sleep. Sometimes the prescription pills didn't work, actually most of the time the pills didn't work. And when you're up at 2am with your brain regurgitating random snippets from conversations, or songs, or something you read on the internet, you just… I just needed it to stop."

  Steve just held his breath as he listened, nothing could have prepared him for this conversation. Loki's confession hitting him like a dose of cold water, washing away all the things he was just worried about in its wake.

  "It started by accident really," Loki continued, his voice quiet and even. "I missed a step coming down the stairs, sprained the hell outta my ankle. The doc didn't think anything about writing me a script for Oxy for the pain. Oh but that first blissful, dreamless night was sheer heaven. Sadly it didn't last and a friend, former friend," he amended quickly, " told me about double dipping to get the drug to work again. I was careful. I read up all the drug studies and interaction side effects and didn't see any reason why I couldn't. So I started mixing my sleeping pills with the Oxy. I soon ran out and this _friend_ gave me some hydrocodone that his grandma apparently had but refused to take. Then when that was out I simply mixed my sleeping pills with Xanax or Valium. I had both from former doctor visits. Hell I had an entire buffet of pills that had never worked on their own for my insomnia just sitting in my cabinet, and if I didn't have something my friend did. I knew it was dangerous, mixing drugs like I knew what the fuck I was doing, but I didn't care. I was sleeping again. For awhile anyway.

  Until fucked up one day and took too many,I just...I couldn’t take it anymore, the being so fuckin' tired and not being able to sleep. I knew that they should be working, they'd worked in the past. I couldn't face the fact that they were wearing off again. That my body was building up an immunity or whatever. I tried to tell myself that they were just old, so the potency would be lower. I just needed to take more.” Loki explained and Steve felt his chest clench at the admission.  
  
  “Loki, I’m so sorry.”

  “Don’t be, I did it to myself,” Loki said with some disgust. “I woke up at Morningside - the Rehab joint out by White Plains. Not a great time, 10/10 do not recommend, but they got me back on track. So now I have to check into see my warden aka my therapist on a regular basis, attend weekly AA meetings, and generally be a model citizen, except now I get to do it all without any pills even my regular sleeping pills and I swear to gods man, if you recommend Melatonin-.”

  “No, babe, I would never.” Steve said and he’d been given that recommendation himself. Kudos to the people it actually worked for, but he wasn’t among those. He asked curiously.“How long ago was it?”

  “Over a year,” Loki said his voice still so quiet. “Not long enough to be leading a quote normal life yet. My warden has very strict rules about when I might be ready to start dating again. Something about learning to take care of yourself first. It’s bullshit, but he may be right. All I know is I don’t want to, no, I can’t fuck up again.”

  “Oh dang, I am so sorry man” Steve said and he honestly was.

  "Yeah well, can't really go back and undo it now."  Loki replied a hint of his normal snark coming back into his voice.

  "So how are you doing, I mean with taking care of yourself?"

  "It's 3:35 in the morning and I'm playing Mario Kart with you." Loki returned flatly and there was the Loki he knew again. He'd just laid his entire dark past out for Steve and he could only hope he would feel as relieved at having it all out as Steve did for knowing it.

  "Sounds like a good time to me," Steve said in earnest.

  "Thank you Steven." Loki said a bit quieter, revealing a honest tone that immediately pulled at Steve's heartstrings.

  "For what?" He asked curiously.

  "For being kind about it."

  "Hey, we've all got things we're working through," Rogers informed him. "This just happens to be yours."

  "Yeah, but I should’ve told you sooner,” Loki admitted. “That’s always been my big problem, opening up to people, sharing what I’m thinking or feeling, asking for help.”

  “I think we all have those problems,” Steve said hoping to lighten the mood a bit. “But I’m here, if you ever need to share what you’re feeling, or if you need help.”

  “I know,” Loki admitted. “I think that’s why I like you so much. You’re the first person I’ve met that I can believe what comes out of your mouth. And I do like you Steven, a lot.”

  “More than Clint or Tony?’ Steve asked only half joking

  “They don’t have my cell number and I don’t let them call me babe,” Loki returned and that was all the answer Steve needed. What they had truly was special.  
  


********

 


	10. Chapter 10

  They fell easily back into their nightly chats after that, sometimes even daytime chats if Steve happened to be out shopping and suddenly require Loki's opinion on something. All the time really gleaning information on him to hopefully be used later. Steak or chicken for dinner? Loki of course preferred seafood. Salad dressing? Catalina French, indicating quite the sweet tooth. Chinese or Italian? Tough choice, spring rolls were great, but the bread sticks were all you can eat.

  Needless to say he was completely blindsided when he walked into Tony's that fateful day, though looking back, knew without a doubt that it was a complete set up. Tony wanting to show off his new monitors just as soon as the tech finished installing them. Steve would have recognize that voice anywhere  
  
  “Loki?” he asked surprised and a bit excited to finally get a glimpse of the other man.  
  
  “Steven?” Loki asks his eyes wide, his head popping up from behind the row of monitors. And what a beautiful head out was, fine high cheek bones, bright green eyes, pale skin, all framed by gorgeous sable locks that seemed to want to curl at the ends. He was stunning and Steve found his breath catch in his chest.   
  
  However, suddenly Mr Stunning is nervously packing his things away. “I uh, sorry, I’ve got to go.”

  “No, Loki wait, it’s okay.”

  "No Steven it isn’t." He bit back, hastily gathering his tools back into their bag, " I can’t ….I can’t date yet. You know this."  
  
  "Loki, I had no idea you were even going to be here," Steve continued, already helplessly feeling the other man slipping away vefore he even got a chance to spend any time with him. " I swear."  
  
  "And I had no idea you two knew each other so well." Tony chimed in, earning a frown from both men. "Oh, wait.Nooooo. This is IT Loki?!"  
  
  "I have REALLY got to go," Loki said scooping his bag under his arm and breezing past.

  “No Please, Loki,” Steve said desperately. He just wanted to spend a little bit of time face to face with the man who’d stolen his heart. To his surprise the lean man stopped at the door, as if considering it, turning to face the large blond slowly. "I brought pizza. Stay and have one slice, just one slice. Please? Babe?” Steve begged putting on his best sad puppy face.

  Loki couldn’t hide the grin already breaching his lips. “Fine, but just one piece.”

  “Yess" Tony said with a fist pump, earning a glare from Steve,. He'd be hearing it from the blond later as to just how far over the line this was. "Now we get to hear all the embarrassing stories about setting up Steve’s computer.”  
  
  “Well then you are in for.” Loki began seeing Tony get all too excited over the prospect before letting him down with”..a big disappointment. Yeah,turns out Steven can read and follow instructions. I know, I told him it was a super power or something.”

  The dinner went well, Loki sitting accross from Steve as they all listened to Tony break the ice by telling stories from game night. Loki and Steve piping up from time to time to share their own game night events. Definitely keeping the topics as far away from anything even resembling date material. Though it was later, as Tony chatted with Pepper on the phone out on the balcony, leaving the two alone at last to, that Steve would always cherish. They moved to the living area, sitting on the wide couch that held four comfortably, sitting just far enough apart.   
    
  Loki often fidgeted with his hands, rubbing them together and shaking them out. Looking at them now in embarrassment as he noticed Steve watching him.  
  
  “Sorry, my hands sometimes shake if I don’t keep them busy. Yay for opoid side effects” he added flatly. “It’s quite funny, I can rewire a computer, why can’t i just rewire my brain?”  
  
  “Babe, it’s okay,” Steve assured him gently, then tried to think of some way to change the subject. “I didn’t expect you to be so..”

  “Skinny?” Loki finished for him easily.

  “No.”

  “Well, I didn’t expect you to be so muscly,” Loki said grabbing one of Steve’s bulging biceps and giving it squeeze. “You said you worked out, but I never expected this."

  “I’m not, I just have a lot of time to kill, so I spend a lot of it working out. It’s a good distraction.”Steve explained, them both knowing why Steve needed distracting.

  “Oh, sorry man.” Loki said pulling back his hand and ducking his head a bit.

  “Hey, it’s okay,” Steve assured him, wanting desperately to reach out and tuck Loki’s sable locks behind his ear so he could see his face again, it was so..”Beautiful. I was going to say that I didn’t expect you to be so beautiful.”

  “Really?” Loki asked searching his eyes and finding nothing but the truth. “You really think that?”

  “I do.”

  “Shit this sucks man," He said with a sigh, looking at his hands again. "Why could I have not met you two years ago?”

  “Hey, I’m here now,” Steve reassured him.

  “I know, but I can’t date you now,” Loki said getting to his feet and stepping away as though the man before him was just too much temptation. Steve felt the same. “I can’t even….kiss you now.”

  “I know,” Steve said softly. “But it’s nice to know that you want to.” He added seeing how it brought a smile to the other man’s face. “And now we have faces to go with the voices. With the phone calls and late night Mario Carts.” That brough a huff of laughter from Loki and made Steve’s heart do that little flip it only does for this man. “I’m fine with that for now. I can wait.”

  “I’ll remember you said that.” Loki smirked. “I should really be going.”

  “Okay babe,” Steve relented, trying to take in every detail of Loki into his memory before he dissapeared again. “Call you later?”

  “Sure,” Loki said giving Steve one last smile before turning to leave.

****  
  
*****

  The days turned into weeks after that, their conversations flowing daily with ease. Everything was going so great, until it suddenly wasn't

  "Fuck, Gods dammit!!"  
  
  "Loki, Loki what’s wrong?" Steve thinks he’s never heard Loki this upset before, come to think of it, he’s never heard Loki upset really at all. More than a bit curious at the other man's obviously upset state when he called Rogers that day.

  “I killed it. I’m a total fuck up and I can’t..I can’t even.." He can hear Loki’s breath hitch over the phone and his sniff, followed by a growl and glass breaking, it was obvious he threw something. Steve knew a melt down when he heard one and he also knew that he needed to calm him down.

  “Babe, babe listen to me,” He said gently, using the pet name as it now rolled off his tongue and the genuine concern he now felt for the other man, even he recognized it was a long time since it was just in jest. “Breathe. I need you to breathe and use words. What did you kill?”

  “My plant,” Loki whined breaking down in sobs, though Steve was a bit confused by such a strong attachment to a plant, his heart ached for the man on the other end of the phone. Wishing he could just reach through and hold him. To be able to offer some physical comfort. Unfortunately, all he could offer was his voice.

  “Babe, babe, it’s okay. You can get another one.”

  “You don’t understand,” Loki sniffed sounding quite like a petulant child, but Steve had him talking.

  “Tell me babe, what’s so special about that plant,” He urged gently.

  “If I can’t keep the plant alive, then there’ll be no goldfish or,or hamster, or fuckin' parakeet,” Loki said and Steve heard something else hitting the floor, possibly a soda can as Loki sniffed again. “I’m sorry, I’m cursing an awful lot.”

  “It’s okay babe,” Steve quickly assured him still not following what was all this meant. “Look, maybe you could back it up a bit for me. Help me understand.”

  Loki took a deep breath and Steve prepared himself for the information that followed, wanting to not miss a single thing. “There's levels, like graduating when you first get out,of..of rehab. You’re not allowed to date for the first year.” Loki was explaining gently, apparently trying to get himself under control. “Then *sniff* you have to get a plant. If you can keep the plant alive for 28 days you can move up to a pet, just a small one is fine.”

  “Right, so a hamster or goldfish,” Steve supplied listening very closely.

  “Then, another 28 with both still alive, the plant and the pet, and finally… Finally you can start dating again” Loki just broke down again at his words. “It’s been one year,7 months and 8 days. I’m never going to get to date, I can’t even take care of a stupid fuckin plant.”

  Steve couldn’t help but smile,though his heart went out to his love. He’d been trying so hard. He knew what it was like to feel like a failure and run out of the energy to keep trying. He also knew the lean man had more strength than he knew, he just needed to bolster him somehow. “Well, what kind of plant was it?”  
  
  “I don’t know,an orchid.”  
  
  “Well, there’s your problem,” Steve said assuredly. “Orchids are very very difficult to keep alive.”  
  
  “They are, I know, I know” Loki asked definitely believing every word that Steve was telling him. “But they’re so pretty.”  
  
  “I know, pretty and difficult.”

  “But I read the books, did what they said. It just mmeeee,” He whined on the verge of losing it again.

  “Oh,noo babe, I’m sure it’s not you, I’m sure it’s not,” Steve said hoping to derail this next breakdown before it started. “Where’d you get it from?”

  “Mernards”

  “Well, there ya go.” Steve said as if it was obvious. “Mernards is the worst place to buy plants.”

  “Really?” Loki asked and he could hear the hope beginning to come back into his voice. “But I buy all my plants there.”

  “And that’ why they all died,” Steve continued coolly. “If you want good healthy plants,you gotta go to a nursery.”

  “Oh….like Greenways out on 12th,” Loki said brightly.

  “Exactly. And don’t buy an Orchid this time. Pick...oh, I know, get a spider plant. You’ll love them because they have little babies that look just like the parent plant.”  
  
  "I don't think I'm ready for children, Steven," Loki said softly, attempting to joke. It was a good sign.   
  
  "Then get something else, a fern maybe. " Steve said smiling as he heard Loki becoming more and more himself again. "They're easy, sunlight and lots of water, that's literally it. "

  “That sounds pretty good,” Loki sighed sniffing again, but obviously more under control now. “Hey, how do you know so much about plants?”

  “Because I’m a total bookworm,” Steve joked lightly. “Turned off yet?’

  “I wish,Fuck. I made a real mess here. I gotta let you go so I can clean this up.”

  “Sure thing babe,” Steve knew Loki was in a much better place than when the phone call had begun. Thanks to him.

  “Hey, thanks Steven. Really.” Loki said quietly.

  “Anytime...really,” Steve returned. He really wanted to tell Loki how much he loved him, but that would only make it harder on them both. At least now he knew why Loki refused to date, and he also had a goal and a plan. They could do this, together.  
  
 ***********  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No offense to Mernards. I have no idea if they even sell plants as we don't have them in the south US. They were simply used for story entertainment purposes.


	11. Chapter 11

  “Oh hey, funny running into you here,” Steve greeted cheerily. He was unsure how Loki would take it, but just had to see him. Especially after last night.

  Loki’s face was at first wide eyed surprise, the most beautiful and brightest of smiles lighting up his face as he recognized the man talking to him. Well, that was good, at least the feeling was definitely mutual. Though it only lasted a minute before Loki carefully schooled it away.

  “What are you doing here?” He hissed looking around nervously as though his therapist was going to come charging in any minute.

  “Me? Oh, just picking up some plant food,” Steve said easily. “How about you? Shopping for a plant?”

  “Steven, you know I can’t be dating right now,” Loki stated honestly looking a bit worried now.

  “Date? This isn’t a date,” Steve assured him. “This is just two friends randomly running into each other. And hey, since I’m already here, why don’t I help you pick out your new plant?”

  Loki only half frowned and sighed, but Steve could see he was giving in. He didn’t point out that it was a little less random since Steve remembered which nursery Loki had named the night before on the phone. He also didn’t mention that he’d been there since they’d opened that morning and would have waited all day if necessary to ‘randomly’ run into the other man. Fortunately, Loki soon relaxed and they spent a very enjoyable couple of hours shopping for a suitable plant, picking out a new pot for it, picking out new dirt for it, naming it, which Steve said was very important, and generally making sure Loki had all the tools he needed to succeed this time. Including Steve’s guidance.

  “Thank you Steven,” Loki said smiling tenderly at the other man.

  “Anytime,” Steve said wanting desperately to kiss him on the cheek, but knew he’d just have to wait. Only 56 more days until their first official date, with his help anyway.

  “Really?” Loki asked with a sly smirk. “Because I think I need grab a Frapp from the Starbucks on 10th next Wednesday around mmm 6ish.”

  “Wow, you know, what are the chances that we randomly run into each other again?” Steve responded quickly catching on.

  “I know, how strange would that be?”

*********

  “Did you water LaFern?” Steve asked dutifully.

  “Yes I watered LaFern,” Loki said rushing around with the phone carefully cradled between his ear and shoulder. “Shit, where is my shoe?”

  “Language babe.”

  “I thought you only cared if I said fuck?” Loki asked teasingly

  “How about Wasabi?” Steve pressed, ignoring Loki’s jest in hopes of keeping him on track as he walked down the sidewalk.

  “Yes, I watered him too.” Loki stated with a sigh. Wasabi was a rather feisty panda oranda goldfish that Steve had helped Loki pick out on one of their random meetings. Exactly 28 days after helping him pick out the LaFern. Loki had wanted to name it Sushi, but Steve said it would give the fish a complex.

  “Baaabe,”Steve chided warningly, but knew the other man was just messing with him.

  “Fed him his special kibbles this morning, he’s a happy flub boy,” Loki replied finally finding his shoe and sliding it on. Pausing to take a deep breath. “This is really happening, isn’t it?”

  “Yes babe, it’s really happening,” Steve said though he was grinning so broadly himself that his cheeks were already aching as he finally reached the brownstone apartment building and looked up at the windows towering over him. “Now get down here so I can finally start dating you.”

  Loki didn’t have a sharp or sarcastic reply. He was just as eager and dashed down the stairs of his apartment. Taking them two by two, and charging straight into the waiting arms of the man who’d waited for him all this time. Steve wrapped his arms around him, lifting him easily as their lips met in their first real kiss.

  “Hey Babe,” Steve greeted warmly, holding his love aloft for just a little longer and stealing another quick Peck before finally setting him down.

  “Hey,” Loki said, appearing to take his first breath in awhile and grinning just as broadly.

  “I thought you were supposed to wait until the end of the date to kiss?” Steve teased as he wrapped his arm about his love’s waist and lead him off down the sidewalk.

  “I think I’ve done enough waiting,” Loki stated leaning into the large blond as they walked.

  “That you have babe,” Steve agreed proudly, kissing his love on the temple. The it sank in a bit more what Loki had said. “Hey, you’re not thinking that we should..”

  “Have sex on the first date?” Loki teased knowing Steve hated that word. “Oh no, now it’s your turn to wait.”

  “Fuck.” Steve said with a mock scowl. Loki turned to him and they both burst out laughing at his obvious jest, before saying in unison.

  “Language!”

********


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BONUS CHAPTER: If you missed the last chapter, go back and read it. This one kind of wrote itself, I tried rewriting it a couple times, but the boys insisted this is how it should go, so hope you enjoy. :-)

  "Ugh, I’m all out of pop," Loki sighed heavily and Steve could hear his fridge door slamming shut in the back ground. "Can you go grocery shop for me? It’s Friday and it’ll be too peopley."

  "Sorry, can't this weekend," Steve said shrugging as he smiled at his Love's description. Peopley was a very apt term to describe the overly crowded state of the local supermarket on Friday nights. " My dance card's full."

  Loki paused before a rapid typing of keyboard could be heard

  "You're Googling that aren't you?" Steve asked though he already knew the reply.

  "Oh you bet I am," His lover admitted proudly.  
  
  "It means I'm busy. You know I have to help Tony this weekend."

  "Oh, I actually know what it means," Loki replied and Steve could almost hear his adorable little smirk over the phone. "However I didn't know which era it came from. Oh while I have you on the phone, are your AARP benefits up to date?"

  "Ha ha," Steve replied flatly, though was already grinning even as he took the ribbing. "You know this would be a lot easier if we both lived under the same roof."

  "You just want the benefit of my super OCD cleaning powers."

  Steve had been to Loki's apartment many times, the place was immaculate, and extremely organized. Not a speck of dust anywhere, all the wires tied in neat bundles, Steve actually thought they looked like ornate Celtic knots, and color coded with Little tape tags. His books were arranged by alphabet and size, even his closet was color grouped. 'Being celebate for so long turns you into a crazy person,' Loki had explained with a shrug. Steve knew by then that he just had to keep his hands busy.

  "I actually just want the benefit of waking up next to that beautiful face every morning," Steve replied, "Honestly the cleaning would just be a perk."

  "Bold of you to assume I sleep," Loki jested flatly.  
  
  "I know you sleep sometimes," Steve countered with a smirk. " I've seen it."

  "I don't know Steven, do you think we're ready?" His love continued as if this was the first time they'd had this conversation. It wasn't, it was closer to the dozenth, "What if we turn into one of those couples that fights all the time, or *gasp* start wearing matching teeshirts?"

  "Oh the horror," Steve laughed at the theatrics. "Though if we have disagreements, that's normal. We'll talk them through."

  "And if we can't come to an agreement?"  
  
  "Then we'll settle it with Mario kart."  
  
  "Oh good, I'm looking forward to winning every argument," Loki stated as he settled back into his squeaky computer chair.

  "I think I'm holding my own quite well now, thank you." Rogers countered easily.

  "That you are, my little prodigy. I'm so proud."

  "C'mon seriously though," Steve continued. "We’ve been dating over a year now, I have the spare room you could turn into your office, you're over at my place most of the time anyway, even your Warden said you were ready to move forward. So what's still holding you back?"

  " _Me_ , I'm holding me back," Loki replied instantly as if it should be obvious.

  "Exactly," Steve replied having already known the answer and pleased to hear his love admit it. This was definitely progress and a good sign that maybe he was finally on the verge of being swayed. "Come on sweetheart. It's time to take that step."  
  
  "Uuuuuuugh," his lover groaned theatrically, giving Steve the impression that perhaps he was just being pedantic to keep him on the phone longer. Yet another good sign."But you'll be gone all weekend, why are we even talking about this now?"  
  
  "Because you can use the weekend to pack without any distraction," Steve filled in instantly, he'd already prethought every excuse Loki would have in order to have the next counter point ready. It was much easier now after being with him for a year, that he knew his partner so well. " and we'll get you moved in on Monday."

  "Monday," Loki said a bit quietly," Steve could already tell he was definitely swaying the other man. It would just take one more small nudge. So he pulled out one he'd been saving for this very occasion.  
  
  "Just think of it, pancakes Ah-la Steve every morning."  
  
  "Well shit, you should've lead with that," Loki huffed out a laugh.

  "Oh, is that all you're with me for?" Steve goaded, though was positively grinning from ear to ear. He had him, he knew he had him.  
  
  "No, you're actually quite good in bed as well." 

  Steve just chuckled and shook his head. " _Loookiii._ "  
  
  "Yes darling?"  
  
  "I love you."

  "I know," the other man said giving quite the dramatic groan before finally relenting. "Dammit I love you too."

  "So is that a yes?" The pause was long enough to make Steve begin to worry before finally hearing the most beautiful resigned sigh.

  "Yes, I'll move in with you."

  Steve pumped his fist in celebration, but kept any verbal cheering to himself. He knew it, but hearing it from his love’s lips was like sealing the deal. "Thanks babe. Now I gotta run. I'll see you Monday, and hey, stay out of your head."

  "Ha!" Loki barked out. "Like that's happening!"

  "Love you."

  "Goodbye Steven," Loki said flatly. He still wasn't one for gushy goodbyes.

 **************  
  
  Steve thought a weekend had never lasted so long. Every hour, every minute he counted down with excruciating slowness. It wasn't like much was really going to change. Loki spent most of his off hours with Steve anyway, arguing that if they both couldn't sleep, then they might as well not sleep...together.

  Work only occasionally cutting in, Steve making sure to give him his space to work when he had to. The rest of their time spent doing everything from playing games, to reading, to playing far more adult games between the sheets. Loki and Steve didn't wait too long after their first date. Truth be told, Steve was the one who put it off longer. He was just old fashioned like that. Oh,but that first time was heaven, and the second time, and every time after that. They'd spent so much time getting to know each other before ever even dating, that by the time they got to it, they felt completely open and comfortable with each other.

  From there the sleepovers, or _not_ sleepovers just flowed organically. Steve would wake up at some crazy hour just as before, the sun not even up yet, and Loki would still be there, already up and sipping coffee. Sometimes they'd just lay together on the couch, reading or chatting. Sometimes they played video games, and sometimes they found more exhaustive ways to fill their time. He wanted desperately to draw his partner, but Loki rarely sat still long enough and every time he noticed Steve looking at him while he sketched, he only seemed to fidget more. He did manage to get a few nice portraits of him as he slept, which Loki announced him a creeper for doing so, but Steve could tell by the pinking of his cheeks that he was flattered by being captured by the one he loved.

   Steve finally returned, heading straight to Loki's. He didn't know what to expect, half of him thought maybe Loki would change his mind, come up with more excuses. He was never so happy to see the stack of boxes as he walked in, having long since moved passed knocking.

  "If you're a murderous robber," came his lover's silky voice from there kitchen. "Just pick a box. I have them labeled and stacked alphabetically for ease of stealing."

  Steve chuckled and followed the voice into the kitchen where Loki was sitting at the table, his head resting on his hands, staring in far too much interest at a rather chubby Oranda goldfish lazily swimming around in it's bowl.

  "Hey babe," Steve greeted coming straight over and kissing him on the head. "I brought you a present."He announced, setting the pink drink in front of the other man.

  "Strawberry Frapp!" Loki recognized instantly, his face lighting up as he quickly brought it's straw to his lips and took a big sip. His eyes closing in bliss as he lowered his head back down to rest upon his other arm.

  "You're all packed." Steve observed, looking around the rather empty apartment.

  "Yeah, I'm all packed," Loki replied softly. As they both swept their gazes over the far too neat stacks of boxes.

  "Did it take long?"

  "No, I hurried up and did it right when I hung up with you,So I couldn't change my mind." Loki admitted finally raising his head and sitting back as he took another sip of his frosty drink. "Though I half considered just getting rid of everything and buying new stuff for your place."

  "That'd be one way to simplify things," Steve chuckled his hands coming to rest on his love's shoulders. "I'm proud of you babe."

  "I'm a bit proud of me too," Loki said honestly. "Though I don't know why I made such a big deal out of it. This isn't a big deal really, I'm over at your place most of the time anyway."

  "I'm pretty sure I told you exactly that same thing," Steve said grinning at his love's easy attitude returning.

  "Did you? I thought it sounded like some old fashioned wisdom," Loki said, smirking around his straw as he took another sip

  "Laugh it up, buttercup," Steve returned, his grin widening from his lover's quip. Steve was old fashioned, in everything from his decor to his ideals. Loki had found out both endearing and a source of amusement. "Though I don't hear any complaining over the old fashioned pancakes I make."

  "Oh gods, those are heaven, you should make some tonight."

  "Pancakes for dinner?"

  "Come on, live a little bit," Loki urged scrunching his nose adorably. "Embrace the wild side."

  "The wild side of making pancakes for dinner?" Steve chuckled awarding his lover another kiss. "I think I can embrace that."

  "Good. Oh, I've also decided something very important." Loki said twisting in his seat to face his love fully.

  "What's that?" Steve asked wondering what epiphany his lover has had while packing.

  "I am not moving those boxes," Loki announced and Steve felt his heart sink. Loki had changed his mind afterall. However he wasn't done and honestly, Steve should've known better. "So the movers should be here in an hour."

  Steve grinned and pulled his love up onto his arms. "I've missed you."

  "I've missed you more," Loki said giving him a quick peck to the lips

  "I'll bet, what did you do to fill your time all weekend?"

  "Hookers and illegal gambling rings," Loki replied with a shrug

  "Did you win any money?" Steve asked not believing him for a minute.

  "Enough to pay for the hookers, but you gotta pay for the movers."

  "Gladly," Steve replied stealing another kiss, their lips parting as they deepened it, sharing the passion of reuniting lovers. "How long did you say we had?" Steve asked breaking just long enough to ask

  "An hour," Loki replied between kisses. "But they'll probably be late,"

  "It's so hard to find good help these days," Steve remarked, grabbing his lover by the bottom and pulling him tight against him.

  " _So_ hard," Loki panted as Steve backed him up into the table, their hips pressed snug together.

  "Wait! wait!" Loki cried out placing a steady hand to Steve's broad chest. "Not in front of Wasabi."

  Steve just smiled and shook his head, lifting his lover up and carrying him off to the empty bedroom, pausing as he noticed the lack of furniture. "Loki, where have you been sleeping?"

  "I haven't," his lover replied as though it should've been obvious. Steve knew Loki often didn't sleep at all when stressed and his heart went out to his love. Though right now there was a far greater pressing need that sleep.

  "Beds are overrated anyway," he said lowering them both down to the floor, and sitting the lean man right in his lap.

  " _So_  overrated," Loki repeated as they dived back into their heated kisses. Peeling off each other's shirts and immediately exploring each other's bared flesh with their hands. Hands that soon worked south to help move the rest of their activities along.  


*****

  "Sorry about your shirt," Loki said as he lay on his back, panting and looking up at the ceiling. "I didn't think to keep out any towels."

  "Shirts are so overrated," Steve replied between heavy pants as well, laying just to his lover's left and also staring at the ceiling.

  "In your case, I'd have to agree," Loki smirked peering over to gaze upon his loves exposed pecs.

  "Loki, are you objectifying me again?"

  "Damn straight I am!" Loki replied unapologetically. "That's my right as your boyfriend."

   
  "You know, I've been thinking about that," Steve began, he'd been thinking for quite awhile actually, and thinking on how to broach the subject. Why not now while they were still both riding a post orgasm high? There was also there fact that Loki was much softer and easier to discuss important things after sex. So much less likely to get too into his head and overthink it. "What do you think about becoming more than my boyfriend?" he began, rolling up on his side to take in his loves reaction. "How about becoming my husband?"

  Loki's face looked perplexed, as if Steve had just asked him some profound mathematical equation, his brow furrowing in deep thought as his lips pursed tightly.

  "I know it’s a lot with everything else going on, and I certainly don't mean right away," Steve continued, hoping he wouldn't scare his lover off, though they'd been dating over a full year now. Honestly, moving Loki in and marriage just seemed like the next logical steps, to Steve anyway. In for a penny, in for a pound right? There was also the fact that Loki hated traditional romance and would absolutely have not wanted a big, get-down-on-one-knee proposal. Which honestly, took a bit of pressure off. Just one more thing to love about this man. "I'd want you to talk to your Warden of course, get his opinion. I just didn't know if there's some tasks we would need to get started on for you to be able to even consider it. Like what comes after a goldish, do we need to get like a rabbit or horse?"

  Loki burst out laughing at that, relieving any tension building up immediately. "A horse??Steven darling, we live in New York City. Where would we even keep a horse?"

  "Well, I never said it had to be a full sized horse," Steve continued smiling as his plan to lighten the mood had obviously worked, and Loki also hadn't shot him down immediately. "Maybe like a miniature horse."

  "You are positively unreal," Loki stated still smiling broadly, which was a much better reaction then Steve could have even hoped for.  "How did I get so lucky?"

  "You picked up the phone and helped this hopeless guy learn how to use a laptop," Steve replied, reaching out and tucking Loki's long hair behind his ear. 

  "You're obviously not hopeless."

  "I felt hopeless," Steve said with a shrug. "Seriously though, you don't have to answer, just think about it and when you're comfortable, let me know what you think. No pressure either way. I just love you so much and I don’t see that changing, ever."

  Loki opened his mouth, no doubt to reply with some small snark as he usually did whenever Steve got this mushy and serious, but a knocking at the door suddenly pulled them apart.

  "Shit, the movers," Loki announced, quickly hopping to his feet and buttoning his pants back up. Putting himself back together as Steve hurriedly did the same.

  "How do I look?" Steve asked balling up his shirt and stuffing it into the first box he found.

  "Hot," Loki replied with a smirk, giving his love an obvious sweeping gaze. "Like I'm not sure I should let them in now. What if they objectify my fiancé"

  Steve froze, did Loki just.. Did he just call him? Loki wasn't waiting around though, sweeping off with a far too smug grin to go let the movers in. He couldn't believe it went that easy, but his love was ever full of surprises. While he knew they would take their time and not rush off to get married, he couldn't hide his excitement. He was about to move his lover into his apartment, where they would be starting the rest of their lives together.

  Steve walked into the next room, stepping straight up behind his lover and wrapping his arms around him. Pulling him close to his chest as he kissed his cheek. The rest of their lives together might not go this smoothly, but this certainly was a good start.

  "You think we should get prenups?" Loki asked out of the blue

  "For what babe?"

  "Well, who gets custody of the horse?"

  "Tony does," Steve replied instantly. Giving his lover another kiss as they watched the movers carting out Loki's neatly stacked boxes. Yes, the rest of their lives together was going to be very interesting indeed.  
  
***********


End file.
